Full Moon 13

Crazy lady rants

Small changes make a big difference

Soo… after 1 cup of coffee,  I had to ditch my DD coffee creamer. 😦 sad sad day for me. BUT, it’s for my own good. 2 tablespoons of that was 60 cals, then to add my french vanilla flavoring (cause i dislike the regular taste of coffee) that was another 60 calories for a “splash”  I turned my normal 160 calorie cup of coffee into almost 300..  cause I had to put way more than 1 serving size to get it just right.  Soo…. I’m back to using my 30 cal fv creamer and my 2 tspn of sugar (30 cal).  Sometimes what you WANT isn’t always what you NEED. Right now my waist size is more important than a commercialized brand I happen to be obsessed with.  Once it warms up, I will ditch coffee altoghether.

Losing weight is extremely difficult. It’s an all day battle, and one weak moment can undo everything you mentally worked for all day. I’m still screwing up, but I refuse to look at or focus on the negatives. It’s a process and every LITTLE thing I do is making a step in the right direction. For instance, I may not be consistantly losing 2-3 pounds a week like I want to, but I’m not gaining either. My weight does fluctuate but because I haven’t given up, the scale stays close to what I’ve already lost.    I have given up before after losing 10 pounds and even though it took 4-5 weeks to lose that 10 pounds I would put it all back on in 2 weeks.

I have been taking Jillian Michaels Fat Burner because I needed help getting started. Those little gems are amazing. I have absolutely NO side effects what so ever! Only positive effects, more energy, I feel like my moods are more stable, the cravings for sweets are 90-95% contained which before I was a chocoholic, a candy maniac, had to have 2-6 sodas a day… now between my new mental attitude and the HELP of JMFB I just have no desire to eat or drink that crap.

I started out at 202.6 March 3rd I didn’t really start trying until around March 17th still between 200-202. It’s now April 21st and even though it’s not much…it’s still SOMETHING. A small move in the right direction… 196.8 

I really would like to lose 2-3 lbs a week, but let’s face the facts… you don’t “lose weight” you have to WORK THE WEIGHT OFF!!!  Fix your food intake meaning not just WHAT you eat, but WHEN you eat and HOW you eat. You also have MOVE! Eating right alone will work for hte first couple weeks.. but then you have to get off your ass which I’m still a lazy fat girl at heart and having problems moving.  I have excuses. I know what they are and I’m not going to sugar coat my own bullshit. My biggest excuse is my kids. Especially my toddler. She’s 3 and at home with me all day. She is attached to me and I don’t have a babysitter.  So trying to get 30 minutes a day where she will leave me alone is almost impossible. I have tried to get her into something while I exercise but she sees me and climbs on top of me, or wraps herself around my leg.

When daddy comes home, it’s dinner, baths, homework (for my older child) cleanup, and here comes my next excuse… I’m too tired.
I told you I’m full of excuses. Those are just my main two.

Well, it’s monday April 21, 2014 and I’m making a promise to whoever is actually reading this blog that by June 21st, I will be down 10 lbs from 196.8. That’s my small goal. Who knows… maybe more than that.

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